Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
