If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Randomize
