Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Randomize
