Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
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