No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
