yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
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