just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
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