Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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