Just cropdusted the office
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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