dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
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