I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
