i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
