i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
