I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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