He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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