He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Randomize
