one two three fourrrrnication!
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
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