i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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