Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
