Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
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