Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
