i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
