Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
