I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Randomize
