my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize
