Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
