you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
