No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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