this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
