You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
