I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
COCAINE IS GR8
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