I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
What a fucking waste of an outfit
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
