Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
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