singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
