I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
