Buhtt sex?
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
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