I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Randomize
