kristin has been a bad kristin
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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