Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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