brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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