i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize