He told me they were just razor bumps!
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
My penis needs a shock collar
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Randomize
