plz talk dirty to me
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I could make wine with my vomit
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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