Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Randomize
