Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
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