Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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