How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize