Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
