he shaved USA in his pubs
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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