Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize
